


Windows and Walls

by notlovenotalways



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Academy Flashbacks, Angst, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Platonic Bedsharing, Post Season 4, post framework, season 5 speculation, space station stuff, subtle reference to a non-con relationship in season 4
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-02
Updated: 2017-08-02
Packaged: 2018-12-10 04:57:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11684556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notlovenotalways/pseuds/notlovenotalways
Summary: Fitz and Jemma are separated and forced to work together on an unknown project by their captors on a space station. Jemma reminisces on an earlier lab they shared, and Fitz makes a discovery. Written for the Tumblr AOS Fic Net Summer Fic Exchange.





	Windows and Walls

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Holly (simmonstheboss.tumblr.com) who wanted some angst, mutual pining, and Academy flashbacks! I hope you enjoy :)

This wasn’t the worst lab Jemma had ever worked in. 

Fairly soon after they were partnered together at the Academy, she and Fitz were squeezed into a 12 foot by 12 foot room with glaring fluorescent bulbs in the ceiling, a pitifully small work bench and second-hand glass equipment. After the third time Fitz had injured himself on a broken beaker, she demanded they be moved to a more usable workspace. 

Agent Anne Weaver flexed her muscle to get them into a more acceptable lab where they spent the next three years. It wasn’t perfect, but at least it had windows and she and Fitz could go outside for lunch when the weather was nice. 

(At least they were together.)

(She could hear his deep sighs when he was frustrated on a project. She could smell the solder as his long fingers tinkered gently with the puzzle pieces on his desk. She could hear him when he cursed a blue streak under his breath in the Glaswegian accent she loved so much. She could feel the warmth radiating off his skin when he rolled up the plaid sleeves on his forearms and brushed his hand against hers while they worked in unison.) 

(It took her years to figure out how desperately she had been in love with him, even then, and she still doesn’t understand how that all happened.) 

Now, they were on a space station fortress, nearly three million kilometers from earth. 

She and Fitz spent most of their waking hours in separate, adjoining rooms that faced one another. It resembled a prison visitors area. She could see him and they could observe each other’s work. She couldn’t hear him unless they picked up the phones on the wall near the one glass wall that separated them. 

The old rotary phone on the wall by her right side. The cream-colored paint was scratched and the cradle had been duct-taped back to the base. It had certainly seen better days, much like she and the rest of the team. 

She stared at the paperwork that covered her desk. She was allowed minimal supplies for writing in order to prevent passing illegal notes during the work hours. One pen that she had to return at the end of the shift. Exactly three sheets of paper. One small desk lamp built into the table top. 

She walked towards the glass and put her hand on the phone, waiting for Fitz to return from his scheduled ten-minute break. They weren’t permitted to take breaks together as their superiors (captors, really) were concerned they would discuss their joint project outside the view of the cameras and outside the range of the listening devices. 

The door on his side of the glass wall opened and he filed in alone, running a hand through his long, grown-out dark blonde curls. Their captors had allowed them to spend an hour together as a team in honor of Fitz’s birthday last week. It was the first time she had been allowed to touch him since they had been on the ship. They spent most of the precious minutes holding each other close and crying. When she lays her head down on her pillow at night, she can still taste the salt of his tears mixing with their lips and his kisses and the feel of his soft curls in her hands. 

She took in a deep, shuddering sigh as he looked up and met her gaze. She pointed to the phone beside him and he picked up the hand piece. 

He put his hand on the glass as he always did. She smiled and placed her hand on the glass, matching his. 

“Hi,” she whispered into the phone. 

“Hi.” 

“Did you sleep well?” 

She knew the answer already, but still smiled when he chuckled. “What do you think?” 

“Me neither,” she replied. They phone time per day was limited – it was clear their captors wanted them to focus mostly on work and not the small talk and quiet comfort that the young couple desperately needed. 

He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Do you remember when we first met?” His eyes bore into hers. 

Her eyes narrowed. She clutched the hand piece and nodded. His non-sequitur put her on alert. They had stealthily agreed on this during their short time together on his birthday – a code phrase that they could use when they needed to convey something secret about the mission. 

“Yes.” Her face fell as he followed her gaze. 

“Jemma –“ 

“Yeah?” she met his eyes again. 

“It’s a weapon,” he mouthed silently and slowly. She needed to understand what he was trying to tell her and he didn’t want to draw too much attention to what they were doing. 

Her eyes grew big. “Fitz – how do you know?” 

He gestured behind her to the large circuit board on his desk. He’d been tinkering with it the past few days with more focus than she had seen his eyes in a long time. Their project was shrouded in secrecy and the timetable was unknown to them. Their captors had insinuated that once it was complete, they would be allowed to move to another area of the space station – together – and share work and living quarters. 

She had held tight to that promise like a beacon, even though she knew she was probably a fool for believing in the word of the nameless band of unknown origin that kidnapped them from their planet and uprooted their lives. 

“I can’t go into it, for obvious reasons. It’s the beginnings of something-- that could hurt a lot of people,” he looked at his feet. 

“What do we do?” she asked in a small voice. 

He looked at her sadly. “I’ve done enough damage on earth – I will not be manipulated into doing the same God knows where else in the universe,” he hung up the phone and turned his back to her. 

“DO YOU HEAR THAT, YOU BLOODY COWARDS? I’M NOT GOING TO DO IT. I REFUSE!” he screamed at the top of his lungs, but Jemma could hear nothing through the sound proof glass. She dropped the hand piece and banged on the glass, trying to get his attention. 

She knew what was going to happen next and it was going to happen in front of her eyes. She was terrified. 

“FITZ! FITZ! STOP IT! Fitz, please!” she banged and cried helplessly as she watched him turn over items in the room before grabbing the circuit board and holding it over his head as if to drop it. 

Red lights and sirens blared in both their rooms as they met each other’s gaze. His dark eyes softened and he lowered the circuit board, clutching it to his chest. They knew they didn’t have long until their captors busted in to deliver unknown retribution for his behavior. 

“Fitz, you have to read my mind right now. You have to.” 

He couldn’t hear her, but he could see her mouth moving and he rushed towards the glass. He pressed his hand on the glass against hers.

“Fitz, just do what they say, please. We can figure this out once we can be together. We will find the others. Please. Don’t give up on that. Hold onto me.” 

He pressed his forehead against the glass as his eyes filled with tears. He banged his head gently a few times into the glass wall and then with more force as she screamed silently for him to stop. Her fists banged louder and louder until the noises melded together and echoed through her quiet lab room.

Over his shoulder, she saw three men in dark suits swing open the door and grab Fitz by the back of his shirt. One grabbed the circuit board from him while the other two restrained him by his legs and arms. 

She banged on the glass to get their captors’ attention, and motioned to the speakers in the ceiling. 

“TURN THEM ON!” she cried. “PLEASE!” 

The one holding the circuit board pulled a small remote from his pocket and pushed a button to activate the communication speakers between the two rooms. 

“Don’t hurt him… please,” her voice echoed through the other side of the lab. She couldn’t hear her own voice through the glass but she knew they could hear her. Fitz’s head lolled back and he bowed slightly into his captors’ arms. 

The man with the circuit board moved closer to the glass and picked up the phone to speak into the hand piece. She picked up her phone that was dangling from the wall. 

“What did Agent Fitz say to you, Agent Simmons?” 

She steadied her gaze. “Nothing of any concern to the project.” 

“I don’t know if I believe you, Agent Simmons.” 

She shrugged her shoulders. “I’m sorry, but you’re mistaken. As you know, Agent Fitz and I are partners in every way two people can be. We were just exchanging pleasantries since you are keeping us separated for no particular reason – even at night when we typically exercise our normal human biological functions of sleeping and sexual intercourse together,” she raised her head in defiance. Over the man’s shoulder, she caught a wink from Fitz. She smiled and pressed on. 

Circuit board man cleared his throat. “Well, Agent Simmons—“ 

“—well, nothing. Agent Fitz suffers from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder related to his repeated assassination attempts by enemies of SHIELD… not to mention residual dysphonia and lower left extremity tremors from a hypoxic injury after nearly drowning at the bottom of the ocean.” 

“Agent Simmons,” he began. “Did Agent Fitz tell you anything particular about his segment of your project?” 

Jemma shook her head. “No. From what I can tell, this was a panic attack triggered by our isolation and the overwhelming aspects of doing menial manual labor on a ‘project’ that we neither know nothing about.” 

The Circuit board man turned to his associates that were tightly holding Fitz. He nodded slightly and they released him. Fitz ran his hands over his face and through his hair before putting his hands on his hips. 

Jemma smiled at him and he winked.

“Agent Fitz. Agent Simmons. When you boarded this space station—“ 

“—you mean when we were kidnapped and taken off-planet and to an unknown location, after biometrically freezing us using an illegal handheld device?” Fitz replied. 

The circuit board man chuckled. “--you were told that if you cooperated, you would be granted certain personal requests in return for this cooperation.” 

“—and our return to earth?” Fitz interjected.

“Negotiable. Depending on how you perform on this project,” the man replied. 

“Certain personal requests? Okay—“ Jemma began. 

“—let’s start with this one. Agent Simmons and I request to share living quarters. No cameras. No audio recording equipment,” Fitz continued. “We will work on this, for however long it takes – but at the end of the day, she and I go to our own private sleeping quarters.” 

The man nodded. “That will be taken into consideration. However, the security risks for such a request are high.” 

“Then put a stupid bloody guard outside our bedroom door. Escort us to the loo and from the loo—“ she interjected.

“—that is our request,” Fitz finished. 

The man sighed. “We grant you this request, and you will finish this project – without incident.” 

“You grant our request of a private sleeping area—for us to use together—and we will comply with whatever you wish,” Jemma met his gaze. 

The man turned to Fitz, who nodded in agreement. “It’s settled then. But now that we have given you this in return, the timetable is being moved up. The project must be completed within one week or all requests will be forfeited.”  
Jemma locked eyes with Fitz. After a beat, he nodded and looked at his feet. 

“Agreed,” they replied in unison. 

 

(The sun streamed in through her lavender curtains. Her eyes fluttered open and she realized she was warmer than normal—much warmer.) 

(It took her a moment to realize that she was warm because her snoring lab partner was currently wrapped around her in her bed like a blanket.) 

(She felt her heart fall into her stomach as she looked at his hand splayed across her abdomen. The long fingers, the perfect nail beds, strong wrists leading into a forearm covered in a plaid shirt.)

(His head laid on her other pillow. She carefully pushed a stray curl off his face, inadvertently tickling his nose during the process.) 

(His eyes shot open and the spell was broken.) 

(“Oh my God—Simmons—I,” he sat up and pushed himself off her bed like a jackrabbit.) 

(Jemma smiled. “Fitz, it’s okay, we just fell asleep.”)

(He rubbed his hands over his face and through his curly hair, which was stuck up in several different directions from sleep.) 

(“Studying too hard, I guess.” He nodded. “Sorry, it, uh—it won’t happen again.”)

(She nodded and tried to hide the slight feeling of disappointment that she didn’t quite understand.) 

(“Okay, Fitz – well—“)

(“—see you later, Simmons.”) 

 

 

Jemma and Fitz sat on opposites side of the small bed, their backs to each other. There were no clocks in the room but she knew they had been sitting silently for quite some time. 

“It’s strange, isn’t it, Fitz?” her voice broke the silence. 

“What’s strange?” he turned his head around to face her. She did the same. 

She reached over to place her hand over his and he closed his eyes. 

“We haven’t shared a bed in months and when we finally get to, we can’t even look at each other.” 

He pulled his hand away and put his head in his hands. 

“I just don’t—“ he started. 

“You don’t what?” 

“—I want—I want to -- make love to you more than anything. But I just—“ 

Her heart dropped into her stomach. 

“But what?” 

“I need time, I think. Still. Before—“ 

She nodded, pushing herself up onto the bed and scooting over to wrap her arms around him. She nuzzled her face into the crook of his neck. She gently nudged him to turn around and face her. She kissed his cheeks, forehead, nose, neck, lips, anywhere her mouth would reach. 

“I would never ask that of you—I would never ask you to do anything you aren’t ready for. I’m not ready for that either. Right now, I just want to be close to you. Please,” she grabbed his hand and brought it up to kiss his palm. 

He smiled and pushed a lock of hair behind her ear. “Together.” 

“Together,” she replied.

He kissed her softly as he laid her back onto the bed, pulling back the covers and her into his arms. She rested her head on his chest and smiled. 

“Goodnight, Fitz. I love you,” she said, kissing the spot where she heard his heart beating. 

“Goodnight, Jemma. I love you, too.”


End file.
